can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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