I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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