WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
why do cheetos always look like penises
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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