uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen