guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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