Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
