that's an acceptable place to lick
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
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i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
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Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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