ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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