All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
