i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I should be sponsored by Trojan
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
