he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
