I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
