If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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