Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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