everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
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