found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
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