I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
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