i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize