I want to walk on stilts...naked
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Randomize
