I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
