When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
