i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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