We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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