Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Randomize
