i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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