There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
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