jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Randomize
