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• (248): View more from Michigan

  Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.

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• (906): View more from Michigan

  And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.

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• (716): View more from New York

  My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.

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• (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.

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• (716): View more from New York

  you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (253): View more from Washington

  So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.

  (1-720): View more from Colorado

  You sound pretty unsure about all of this.

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?

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• (631): View more from New York

  You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low

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