Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting. http://tfl.nu/a3qg
  Replies (16) Good night (2799) Bad night (2057)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek. http://tfl.nu/wo3r
  Replies (18) Good night (3594) Bad night (4865)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof http://tfl.nu/xt5p
  Replies (4) Good night (3826) Bad night (834)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant. http://tfl.nu/88h4
  Replies (18) Good night (4233) Bad night (955)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems http://tfl.nu/opwd
  Replies (19) Good night (4382) Bad night (917)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done. http://tfl.nu/i81l
  Replies (18) Good night (8664) Bad night (785)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer. http://tfl.nu/tp9x
  Replies (5) Good night (2286) Bad night (824)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks. http://tfl.nu/qdu7
  Replies (26) Good night (906) Bad night (5782)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night http://tfl.nu/for8
  Replies (9) Good night (4782) Bad night (1552)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys http://tfl.nu/i7wv
  Replies (2) Good night (2186) Bad night (1140)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?" http://tfl.nu/zkkw
  Replies (6) Good night (1820) Bad night (2604)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case? http://tfl.nu/t5hu
  Replies (4) Good night (714) Bad night (300)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (479): But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups. http://tfl.nu/j3mw
  Replies (1) Good night (282) Bad night (242)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married http://tfl.nu/jbyv
  Replies (4) Good night (558) Bad night (212)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville http://tfl.nu/saxt
  Replies (0) Good night (787) Bad night (152)

Randomize