I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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