i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
