I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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