Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize