Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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