if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
