We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Randomize
