That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
