Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
