butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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