Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
