rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
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