If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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