I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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