some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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