he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
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