after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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