She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
She's better-looking with the mask on.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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