i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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