Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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