He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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