i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
